finding Meme

I have been away so long I for got who I was and so have had to spend some time
finding a new pass word and guessing who i was that I will just say hello to night-
I have been on a huge journey but will sort that out another time- God bless you for
praying for me- please keep praying
the battle with cancer goes on........
hugs Meme

chemo is coming

I have my first chemo treatment on Oct-28 Wednesday- at 9:30 a.m.
I will update more tomorrow-5 sleeps to go-- I hope I can rest the night before- I am happy to know I have a date now but also very anxious.hugs from Meme

yesterday's cancer news

today was very long and tiring - and the news is rough.
I have cell cancer in the lining of my stomach and it is not the good cancer.
-they can treat me but there is no cure.
it is the same cancer that David had except that it is in my lining of stomach rather than pancreas and Davids had already became terminal.
I will begin treatments soon and I have to have a colonoscopy on Friday to determine if it has spread to the bowel.It did not show on the ct scan but he said the scan can not pick up this up there too well so the colonoscopy..yuck
I am very tired and exhausted and just shell shocked---I will be better tomorrow( and I did as it is now tomorrow ) it is fine to share and I will up date as I can- as long as folks realize this is really all i know and that next week I will get the port put in and I cannot individually reply right now--it is going to be a tough battle to get me into remission but I have hope as that is what the doctor gave me as well as the grim news.---radiation will not work for this type of cancer and I have not reached a terminal stage right now -------- remission is good thing -

hugs from Meme

in memory of papa---blessing

today 2 of his friends came with trucks and cleaned up my back yard of things that were done and also cleaned out an entire shed so that I have a whole unit to store things so that I can continue to down size and if I am not sure I can still remove from the house-I was so blessed== also can put all the thrift store stuff until they come back and they will take it down for me-this is like having a whole new room added to my house-they took an old chair and dresser and hamper from the house for me too - which adds more space for me they did it in memory of papa and in honor of meI am so blessed--I was able to share some of papa hubbys things with them- R------has a whole load of wood for their wood burning stove as papa hubby had a lot of willow saved up for his canes he made--they tried to pay me and so I tried to pay them-- and we both agreed that this is what friendship is for--and so we both won each other over -

will write soon- huggles me- Meme

ct scan done :-)

the scan and the day went smoothly- hoping the results will be in by Friday but not for sure.
I go to the city hospital but they still have to be read and sent to another cancer clinic for further reading--so I am being a patient waiting patient but the good news is that
I have my first appointment on October 13 at the cancer clinic so I will begin my journey then-
I had a good day and was able to get the kitchen back to my standards which is two clean sinks
so just being able to do that makes me feel better-
I just puttered and rested etc-
forgive me for times between updates but I have to try to rest and take things easy and even phone calls and emailing is tiring on some days- I am learning what balance is...........
I love you guys and know that you are holding up in prayer- that is the greatest blessing of all

huggles from Meme

Dogman is with papa

Dogman has been sick off and on with his Cushings and the last two days were too much for himand his kidney's stopped filtering the water he was drinking which meant his blood was getting no water and
I
took him to the vet but there was nothing she could do but gently send him to papa hubby- He was so weak and just went to sleep with a calming drug - she knew he was dying so we sat in a special room togetherand he slipped away- she did have to use the death medicine-
He seemed content to be with me - He would have been 13 tomorrow- he is being cremated privately and will come to us in a pretty cedar box- with his name on and '' thanks for the memories. I am ok as ok is for me right now
and my little bird was bit by a bee and died 15 minutes afterwards so today is not a good day here=
The shepherd is carrying me tonight and praise God as my ct scan is on Oct-6
and I will answer some of the lovely private messages soon-
I had to take care of Dogman for the last two days as I wanted him to be comfort and so I got behind in emails-
hugs from Meme

the letter O

I rather got behind on letters so will now just think about O
I will just do letters when I can....
of course, there are Oreo cookies which most folks love but I have
to admit I do not- and there are oats which take part in our daily lives in
cerels and breads- cheerios with honey :-)
but for me right now is the word OH
it often prefixs( is that the correct thought) my words
like oh no---which was one of my first thoughts about this cancer
and of course- my prayer- Oh God, help me- this was my cry
this week end and I know that He is with me and although I can
not see what He is doing right now, I can feel His presence-
so often, David of the psalms cried out to God and God heard and we
know when we cry that we are heard.
My other prayer is that God's will be done
even though there will be days and times that I/we
do not want His will...........
I am sure there are other O words but as I am winging it tonight
I will leave you with this thought-
Oh God, thank you for leading me this far.........

hugs from Meme

Meme has bad news

I had to go to the doctor for him to check the biopsy site for infection or problems- that part is ok but the first of the results are in and I do have cancer- they do not know where it is originating from at this time and they do not know if it is good or bad- I have to go to the cancer clinic in the city and also have ct scans done asap- there is no doubt about the lump containing cancer but the problem is why?? once they know the origin it will be easier to make plans of what the chemo will be and if there will or will not be surgerythat is all I know today-- I am stunned and do not really know what to say except pray for me- I will weep today- then have a good week end and begin the battle on MondayI will tell you whatever I know when I know itI cannot say anymore right now as this note hurts me to have to tell you my sad news
I love you- friends from Meme

home from biopsy

i am home- the test was quite pain free but oh my, now it is so painful re my left side - face- etc- took some pain meds and must do nothing for a few days- no reports for 10 days as they have to do extensive testing- and we will go from there-i am very tired so I will go to bed again- I will blind copy to groups== they did 7 different needle tests and I swear each needle got bigger but he did it with the ultra sound so he knew where to go----------thank you for praying
loving thougts from me and gentle right arm huggles

missiing letters

• I see that I have missed some of our letters for unglazed
• and will have to back track and see what I can find to tickle
• your funny bone,,,,,,,
• daddy always used that expression when he was about to tell a story
• the weather has been great
• had to take Miss Ashley to the doctor
• for another foot sprain=
• it is the main muscle in her foot this time
• so she is limping again=
• she tends to fall off her foot on the left side
• so needs to be more careful when running or
• walking
• then we went out for supper at a local cafe
• which was rather fun - just her and me being together
• with out the boy who is a friend............and also
• no Dogman to give us the begging eye--
• we came home and both had a nap--LOL
• the doctor can not give me either encouragement or
• discouragement re the lump===
• he just does not know and wants to have it taking care of
• quickly but he did say he will do everything in his power
• to make sure this is taking care of now-----------
• so the biopsy will really tell us a lot so we can
• move forward-
• have a great work and I will work on my unglazed alphabet
• thinking on things like that put me to sleep which
• is a good thing
• hugs from Meme

this is Meme

I am ok but tired and weary
and also have found a health issue
about 4 weeks ago I noticed a lump on my lower neck
and in a few days it got bigger so
off to the doctor
so far I have had x rays
and then blood tests
and then ultra sound
and now on the 21 of Sept. I will have a biopsy
I feel ok about this but being so tired
this has added to my load
I am keeping the faith and
just trying to take things one day at a time
the tummy is still an issue and that appointment
is not until October 8
I have been eating better as I want to be strong
for the biopsy ( it is a lymph node)
so I just have to try to overcome the stomach pain
but as we all know
when one has chronic pain
it does take a lot of energy to keep
going and going=
I will be back soon
I just to weary to think out tales
loads of love
and huggles
from Meme

sneaking in late

• I have just been, well not here, LOL
• however tomorrow I have to come with an S word-
• so I will make sure that I get a good sleep
• and then sort out something sensible--(wink)
• not sure how the week slipped by so fast
• but I am ok---
• I did go to a funeral for an good friend
• to papa hubby and I on Friday-
• he too died with cancer
• I did see some old friends there
• and also David's sister came and sat
• with me so it was full of good memories too.
• and then I saw one of our old pastor's
• from a little pentecostal church where
• we used to go before we were planted at the Nazarene church
• both are lovely God filled churches and we only
• moved with prayer as we needed a Sunday school for our grand-kids
• as we took them every week- ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
• but back to the pastor- he did not know that papa graduated
• from his earthly life-
• so we had a sad but nice visit and
• I have to say that this is the first church function
• that I have attended since papa hubby's death
• where I did not look for papa-
• it was a sad occasion and yet I felt free of a burden
• that I have carried since July 21- 2008
• pray for widow Betty as she begins her journey of grief-
• off to see if I can sleep on a S word
• and fix a tale for you tomorrow.

My plans..........

Just stopping by to say hello- I was looking for this picture to share as it reminds me of

how we can make joy with and for each other- just by sending a smile-

so here is mine today-- I just noticed I have a file here(in the computer) for spring chores to be done in 2008--and none of them are done-!!!

it made me think of how life is full of our plans but in the spring of 2008 the Lord had me taking care of dear papa hubby = and so those spring chores were filed away. I did not do them this spring either re my health as I must do as I can do when I can now.

-. I wonder if I should rename the file for 2010- no, maybe not- God will show me his plans then and they will be good plans for me-.

Have a wonder filled week that is left and I will pop in soon.

huggles from Meme

Unglazed Letter T

• here we are with another week and a new letter for:

http://unglazed.blogspot.com/

• T is one of those letters that begins a lot of words



• maybe too many because I had a hard time picking one



• I could rant about my tea that I can no longer drink



• but I did that once already and it has been



• two whole weeks tea-less- and I did try to drink



• a cup of decaffeinated but it was no go......



• so I will remain tea-less



• so now I have to find another word that begins with T



• my biggest trouble here is that I have no pictures to post


• that begin with T but T does remind me of the word


• TWO which reminds me of matched sets


• like salt and pepper,


• cream and sugar-


• husband and wife


• each one can stand alone but together they


• make a perfect set-.


• Now I will close with a hug
• Meme

an alphabet blessing----- B*

• I love to read and may even be addicted to reading
• and because of this joy I have books-
• I do not keep too many fiction books other
• than the Jan Kuron series-
• I like the way she writes which makes
• me feel that I am there..
• not just peeking into window
• but in the room.
• I also have a lot of devotional books
• which really help me on when
• I am have an A** day......
• and I have my Bible(s)
• I do enjoy reading different versions
• and some of them explain what some things were/are-
• I need to go through the books again
• and pass some on to the church-
• we have small library there and I
• can always go borrow the book back-
• I think of how so many people have
• not learned to read- even now with
• it mandatory to go the school.
• Television has taking over the books
• and it cannot teach reading and then there
• is the computer but to me,
• there is something special about cuddling up
• in a warm blamket and a book
• Have a wonder filled week end
• and Meme will come back soon
• with another alphabet blessing.
• I will not go in any particuliar order but
• just as words come to mind to tell
• the tale of the blessing.
• Hugs from Meme

Unglazed letter for Monday is U

• it is not quite Monday here but by the time you read this



• it will be because I am trusting that you are all in bed.



• remember this link and join in the fun:



• http://unglazed.blogspot.com/



• **************************



• the letter U tried to stump me but it rained here



• a lot the last few days so I remembered my



• UMBRELLA



• we all have them and some folks even collect umbrellas-


• and umbrellas are not a new invention-


• I see a lot of those pretty Victorian ladies


• often with an umbrella to shade their faces


• from the sun


• and in some places; one can use an umbrella


• to keep the rain off their hair


• but


• in Alberta we have storm rains and we do


• not even try to battle the storm using an umbrella


• we have all tried at least once but with Alberta wind


• the umbrella becomes a version of the old flying machines


• and one could easily take off flying and sometimes
• the umbrella turns in side out and then one has to try
• to reason with the umbrella as it becomes a bucket
• - as our rain


• does not come straight down like in the movies ==


• it comes sideways and back and forth and sometimes


• even up- did you that know rain can bounce??


• but I still love umbrellas as they come in such


• nice shapes and colors- all little girls must have at least


• one umbrella every summer and some of us big girls too.


• most ladies who golf has a least one big umbrella that someone


• holds over the other friends waiting for a the putter to putt.


• and sometimes you see a gentleman struggling to


• keep his lady dry while they are both blowing in the wind.


• I use one in the summer to put over the bird cage


• on sunny days so our bird can enjoy outside life in the shade.


• umbrellas remind me of romance too and I have no


• idea-- maybe because of the old song '' Dancing in the Rain'' which


• we Albertans would like to try if our rain did not come


• down in so fast and hard.
• Have a wonder filled week.......and


• May you be covered by an umbrella of joy today-

an alphabet night B*

• another a blessing in my life is bread


• I did bake bread for us but now with me


• it seems easier to buy bread


• and I found this wonderful whole grain bread


• at a new store in town- the loaf is huge so I


• have to split it in 3 and the good news is that I


• can get the teen - age girl to eat it also-


• it does cost more but when you figure out the weight


• and size it is comparable to the white fluff--


• mama always baked bread and I have never got


• used to the sliced white air bread =


• I know a lot of folks like the idea that bread


• comes sliced and ready to go........but I grew


• up with home made bread that we sliced one


• piece at a time-
  
• daddy taught me how to hold the loaf and slice-


• once winter comes and it will come to Alberta-


• I will bake again and I found some neat small


• bread pans down stairs--( my basement is like a


• thrift store) that I can now use ......again.


• I have the bread machine too but only use


• it for mixing as I love oven baked bread.


• my hands are too arthritic to mix by hand


• so the machine is another blessing.


• as I have been considering my things


• as blessings, I have found that I enjoy


• the never-ever ending care more.


• and I am now sharing some of these blessings


• with others as I no longer need them.


• I do not have a picture of bread tonight
• but I know that each of your homes
• are blessed with daily bread=
• have a wonder filled week end
• hugs from Meme

Thursday Tales

• weather was --cool, clouds with sun hiding and threats of rain


• widow friend came over for tea so I made dinner for us


• just a macaroni hamburger pie and cantaloupe and


• no tea for me but a nice pot for friend-


• Dogman sinned - tried to, no did steal ( is there a less harsh word?-lol)


• my cookies in my book bag-


• I try to nibble whenever I can so I keep cookies(oatmeal )


• in the bag in case I go for a walk and sit a spell


• so now the great debate is that there is crumbs in my bed


• as the bag sits on a small basket at the end of my bed-


• I tend to keep more things in my bed than just me


• but back to the crumbs- sigh


• I shall have to remake the bed because like all good cookies


• there were a few chocolate chips in them


• and chocolate chips never just make crumbs


• so now Dogman is off to his bed


• looking sheepish which is not hard to do with his


• hair which is according to the vet- is called fur -LOL


• the worse part for him was that I was vacuuming when


• I entered the room so he had to bale out and run


• past that machine which he barely tolerates when


• it is not moving---------


• oh, well- dogs will be dogs and he knows that I know


• that he knows better...........


• and Meme will have a fresh bed tonight-

off to make my bed -- sending hugs--- Meme

3 days with out tea

• wow- having a bad tummy sure is tough on addictions
• that is things like tea and coffee and chocolate and.......
• I gave up chocolate quite a few months ago unless
• Miss Ashley tempts me ---:-) and that is not often.
• and coffee and I parted ways many years ago
• and now I have decided to go tea free for 2 weeks
• and see if this will helps and then maybe forever
• depending on the outcome-
• which leaves me drinking water and water and water
• so I fill my little teapot (4cups) twice a day and add
• ice-cubes now and then-
• I do some milk in between.
• It is not so bad giving something up but
• the hard part was ''not'' making the tea
• it was such a in grown habit
• I did have an appointment with my specialist
• for Aug. 30 to make some decisions in regards
• to this problem and the office called yesterday
• and changed it to October 8.
• yes, I did cry as this just seems to be going
• on far too long so I will keep this appointment
• if it is not changed again and also ask for a new
• specialist- this has been going on for 2 years now
• and every appointment made has been redated-
• pray for me to find medical treatment soon
• we know what is wrong but now something
• also needs to be done ........
• I am really lost as how or what to eat
• anymore
• any one interested in Nutcracker Syndrome can
• google it - plus Barrets Disease
• do not take my spelling as correct *
• other wise I am fine-boo hoo
• and alas, no to any of those drinks
• other than the instant breakfasts
• I have to avoid high fat also
• The office did tell me if the pain increases too
• much to go to the city emergency rather
• than our local town as they can get a
• the specialist quicker------(-there are no pain
• meds one can take for this--)
• however I sure would rather have things
• taking care of before an emergency=
• there: I did my tea whine(LOL)
• now I will go drink some more water.
• huggles Meme

ABC Blessings * A

• an old picture of Dogman sun tanning --He was getting ready to help papa hubby weed-whip.
• My brain has gone to alpha-bites--LOL


• and I was thinking off different items in the house


• that are blessings that I see and and yet, some how


• do not see----------


• I enjoyed the letter V unglazed that


• so many of us did yesterday.


• I think everyone had a different V that


• they expressed in writing and pictures.


• I am going to have to work on the letter U


• but for today I will list some A blessings-


• that seem plain and simple but blessings


• are never plain and simple when we


• see them as blessings.


• ----------------


• A is for


• applesauce




• I remember mama making applesauce in the early fall- she used the crab apple


• which by its self can be quite tart and slightly bitter but with a some


• sugar added, it became a nice fruit and dessert -


• we would pour it over toast and then eat our special breakfast


• with a knife and fork. She added a touch of vanilla and a bit of butter


• to the sauce when she took it off the stove.


• Now I buy those little fruit cups in the store-


• where we live they are less expensive than the apple


• and provide me with vitamin C and Dogman loves to


• clean out the near empty cup and pack it around all day-


• I have an unconscious rule to leave just a little


• so he does not work for nothing.LOL
• huggles from Meme and Dogman too.